Let’s start with my anxiety levels. Interestingly enough they have been up and down for the past few days but I haven’t hit many debilitating patches that have forced me to make evasive manoeuvres.
After we made the decision to sell the Sunworks building, and to turn over the operations of our other businesses, everything is in a state of flux. We suspected this would happen, and perhaps this is why we’ve put off the decision until now.
We are entertaining new business arrangements with some folks that want to move to our location, all of whom we believe will benefit the existing businesses and add new life to the street. We’re very excited about these connections. I wish we could say more but until things are formally known, and it’s time for them to announce their plans, we will work to find the right match for the street and the neighbours — for the benefit of all of downtown.
We’ve hired a realtor and he is working on the valuation and listing. More will be known next week. What feels certain at the moment is Sunworks will move to the Metropolitan Block. This will be a fresh start for us. We’ll focus on product and services that you just can’t, or don’t want to, buy online. We are thinking about the move in January/February. This will depend on the work our realtor does and the decisions of new tenants.
It’s a crazy activity for the dead of winter. Yikes. I’ll need a warm break after that for sure. Thailand or Greece perhaps. Hmmm.
My goal at this point is to do a little every day to keep all of the changes moving in the right direction and to quickly address any issues that arise as a result of our decisions — course correcting will be needed… as well as communicating as best we can through the entire transition.
I may have mentioned this before… the strange part about the anxiety I face is, if at the beginning of the day I have energy, I don’t know when it will run out and when I’ll want to hide under a rock. In the past couple of weeks that’s sometimes been a few minutes, or a few hours, or a couple days. It’s a mystery, and I’ve noticed that any emotional turmoil sinks me quickly.
As a result, I’ve closed my complaint department. I chatted with Roman this week about the nature of complaining. He suggested that complaining could be purposeful and involve action, perhaps even be healthy. I really am not sure.
I used to be a positive person, and want that back. I used to believe in humanity and want to believe in goodness again. Part of that for me is to stop my own complaining, letting my bitterness go, and embracing some new possibilities. These changes and decisions may be part of that.
I’m not sure what complaining is but I feel badly when it’s coming from me, and when I’m hearing it from others. There has to be a time and place to be critical without being toxic. Since what we say alters our relationships, and as a result our own identities, it’s important that what we choose to engage with strengthens what is good and hopeful. How to distinguish complaining may come down to tone, and motive — why are we saying something, and how are are saying it.
To those of you that did very nice things for me this week, hugged me, said hello, shared your support and encouragement, invited me ahead in the grocer’s queue — thank you.
I continue to share this journey with you this autumn, in as brave a way as I can muster, with the hope that I might find a way to connect with you in a real way, and that you might find ways to connect with the world as well even as it faces more fierce chaos. It’s not my best, shining self, that I share, all polished-up and glistening. Instead it’s a journey, that I as a middle-aged human, of a certain background, with a certain set of relationships, undertake in which I try to figure out how to get to my preferred future — hopefully I can do this by shifting my relationships with friends, colleagues, ideas, places, and things.